Turning Anxiety Into Action: Making Stress Work for Them

Sometimes, anxiety feels like carrying more than you can handle. Step by step, though, you can move forward and lighten the load.

It’s tempting to run from it, but anxiety is something we can actually work with. For young adults, it often feels like a stop sign. It shows up when there’s something that needs doing, then leaves them frozen in place. As a parent, this is where you can step in with a little structure and a lot of understanding.

When someone’s dealing with both ADHD and anxiety, there’s often a tendency toward black-and-white thinking. The mind either jumps to the absolute best case or the catastrophic worst. That middle ground? It often gets missed. I see this with a lot of the young adults I work with. They get overwhelmed by imagining a disaster that probably won’t happen. That can stop them from taking even one step forward.

A helpful shift here is encouraging them to challenge those thoughts. Ask: “How likely is that worst-case scenario?” and “What’s one small thing you could do that wouldn’t feel so overwhelming?”

Break It Down: Heat Level Check

This is where the “heat level” idea comes in handy. I like to ask, “Do you want this task at a level two or a level five?” If something feels too hot to handle, we cool it down by breaking it into smaller, more manageable chunks. Then we break those down again if needed. With ADHD, task breakdown doesn’t always come naturally, so having a parent or coach help with that can make a big difference.

Making Friends With Anxiety

Trying to shove anxiety away usually just makes it louder. Sometimes, it helps to sit with it, acknowledge it, and use it as a signal. The body is saying something needs attention. When action follows, even a small one, the anxiety often quiets down.

For those with ADHD, a more sensitive nervous system and an overactive amygdala mean that anxiety can be louder than the situation really calls for. That’s not failure. That’s just information. With tools like mindfulness and a few perspective shifts, it’s possible to move forward anyway.

If this speaks to you or someone in your life, feel free to reach out. I’m here to help.